Intro | 0:00

INTRO SEQUENCE:

KINGDOM: ANIMALIA PODCASTS STING

OPENING THEME

Theme music continues in BG.

DEVON

Hello and welcome back to Kingdom: Animalia: the podcast where we usually cover all the facts about one species in this amazing kingdom: Animalia every episode. I’m your host, Devon--

CHET

Chicka And we’re your co-hosts, Chicka Chet,--

CAP

Chicka And Cap!

DEVON

And today I have the answers you’ve all been waiting for: the reveal of which of the five Late-pril Fools animals was fake. So, without much further ado, I bring you Late-pril Fools: The Big Reveal.

SNAP

MUSIC fades out

The Big Reveal | 0:47

DEVON

And now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Can I get a drumroll, please, Chet?

CHET

Chicka Alright. I’ll have to Chicka pull out my timpani for this.

(Grunts)

Chet DRAGS in the TIMPANI.

CHET (CONT’D)

Chicka Here we go.

TIMPANI DRUMROLL begins

DEVON

There were five animals: the Sarcastic Fringehead, Common Side-blotched Lizard, Atlantic Mudskipper, Hoatzin, and Stomach-Sucker.

DRUMROLL picks up

DEVON (CONT’D)

And the fake animal that I just made up was the…

DRUMROLL crescendos

DEVON (CONT’D)

Stomach-Sucker.

DING-DING-DING

FOOLS REVEAL MUSIC (“TROPIC”) begins

DEVON (CONT’D)

Yes, the fake animal, the one that tried to Late-pril Fool you like the False Cleanerfish (which is real, by the way) tries to fool larger fish looking to get cleaned… was the Stomach-Sucker. Sorry, Mom and Dad.

ENDING PART OF SAD TROMBONE

DEVON (CONT’D)

But before I get into recapping, let’s talk about the prize. Yet again, there were no guesses.

CHET

Chicka Their loss. Chicka I guess we’ll have to keep them ourselves and admire our stunningly Chicka good looks every day.

DEVON

Not so fast. See, because you didn’t send in any correct guesses (or any guesses), we are holding a raffle. If you submit your name before the first day of October, you can get entered to get a chance to win the set of Chet and Cap models. To enter the raffle, visit kingdomanimaliapod.com/raffle, which is also linked in the show notes. (speaking like in a commercial) Again, that’s kingdomanimaliapod.com/raffle or the link in the show notes to win your very own set of Chet and Cap models if you enter before October 1st.

(speaking normall)

Now,… let’s get on with the episode.

Just like last time, the scientific name was real: the cibufurem in Aspidontus cibufurem does indead come from the Latin “cibus furem,” meaning “food thief.” Aspidontus, on the other fin, is the genus that contains the False Cleanerfish. As I said, False Cleanerfish do indeed imitate Cleaner Fish using the display I described for Stomach-Suckers in order to snatch scales off of their fish victims. But everything else, from the sneaking into stomachs, to their babies eating algae, to their scales being the inspiration of wear-resistant materials (and, of course, Stomach-Suckers’ existence) was completely made up.

And now, before we close this up, I want you to do something.

MUSIC ends

DEVON (CONT’D)

Open up the device you’re using to listen to this (unless it’s your parent or guardian’s phone and they’re using it for mapping while driving) and go look up pictures of all the real animals—the Sarcastic Fringehead, Common Side-blotched Lizard, Atlantic Mudskipper, and Hoatzin. Then, just pause this podcast and take a few seconds to absorb the nightmarish jaws of the fringehead, the mash-up-punk-rock-pheasant-chicken look of the Hoatzin, and the appearance of the mudskipper, which is, as well described by Ed Yong for National Geographic, “like a tiny doorstop with a pair of fins and googly eyes.”

Outro | 3:24

TOYS ON PARADE fades in

DEVON

If you would like to find that quote, as well as all of my other sources for the Late-pril Fools animals, you can check out my Works Cited, which is at kingdomanimaliapod.com/fools2024reveal. There, you can also read the transcript for this episode. Again, you can enter the raffle to win the Chet and Cap models by submitting your name before October 1st by going to kingdomanimaliapod.com/raffle. Additional music in this episode is by ZapSplat, at zapsplat.com.

CHET

Chicka If you like this podcast, then chances are, someone you Chicka know will too. Chicka You can give them a new Chicka podcast to listen to and support us Chicka by spreading the word about us. Chicka Tell your friend. Chicka Your teacher. Chicka Even that butterfly in your friend’s Chicka insect collection that your friend insists is Chicka dead–

WAR MUSIC (MIGHTY AND MEEK) plays in BG

CHET (CONT’D)

–but you know is Chicka really alive and a spy for the butterfly Chicka empire, collecting information to plan for the butterfly Chicka takeover of the world.

WAR MUSIC ends

DEVON

Right. But it really helps us out. If you want to go the extra mile, you can support us on Patreon at patreon.com/KingdomAnimaliaPodcasts (that’s “podcasts” plural) for as little as one US dollar a month. Benefits include shout-outs, second guesses to the riddles, and one week early access to the next season of Where Are the Chickadee Brothers?, which we’ll start working on as soon as we’re done with the next few episodes of this podcast. But if that’s not an option for you, just spread the word. You or your parent or guardian can email us at animals@kingdomanimaliapod.com to send questions, comments, episode suggestions, riddle guesses, or just verification that I’m not just talking into the void and all of the download numbers are actually from Chet and Cap. Speaking of which, here’s the riddle for the next episode. “I hold the non-human record of knowing the most English words, I come in many different colors, I’m the most common of the pet birds. Who am I?” Send in your guesses, and I’ll tell you if you got it right, but if you get it wrong, you’ll have to wait until the next episode to find out. The email and all the links I mentioned are also in the show notes.

That’s it for now.

MUSIC transitions to ANIMALIA ELECTRO ROCK

DEVON (CONT’D)

So, until next time, enter the raffle, never be mean to a Sarcastic Fringehead, and keep exploring the amazing (and insane) Kingdom: Animalia. Bye!

CHET

Chicka Bye!

CAP

Chicka Bye!

MUSIC picks up and plays out

CAP

Chicka You don’t have to worry about the Chicka butterfly takeover. Chicka All you have to worry about is Chicka the bird takeover. Chicka Wait— Chicka Is the recording still Chicka g–

MUSIC ends

END OF EPISODE.

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​‌‌‍‍​‍Hutchings Museum Institute. (n.d.). Atlantic Mudskipper. Retrieved April 1, 2024, from https://johnhutchingsmuseum.org/atlantic-mudskipper

​‌‌‍‍​‍L’Aquàrium de Barcelona. (n.d.). Atlantic mudskipper. L’Aquàrium De Barcelona. Retrieved April 1, 2024, from https://www.aquariumbcn.com/en/especies/amphibians/atlantic-mudskipper/

​‌‌‍‍​‍News Staff. (2014, January 23). Hoatzin: South American Bird May Have Originated in Europe. Sci.News. https://www.sci.news/paleontology/science-hoatzin-bird-europe-01713.html

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​‌‌‍‍​‍Sather, P. (2023, August 13). 10 Birds with the Craziest Hair. A-Z Animals. https://a-z-animals.com/blog/10-birds-with-the-craziest-hair/

​‌‌‍‍​‍Sholtis, S. (2023, April 24). A blinking fish reveals clues as to how our ancestors evolved from water to land. Penn State University. https://www.psu.edu/news/eberly-college-science/story/blinking-fish-reveals-clues-how-our-ancestors-evolved-water-land

​‌‌‍‍​‍Sinervo, B., Miles, D. B., Frankino, W. A., Klukowski, M., & DeNardo, D. F. (2000). Testosterone, Endurance, and Darwinian Fitness: Natural and Sexual Selection on the Physiological Bases of Alternative Male Behaviors in Side-Blotched Lizards. Hormones and Behavior, 38(4), 222–233. https://doi.org/10.1006/hbeh.2000.1622

​‌‌‍‍​‍Southern, J. (2000). Neoclinus blanchardi (Sarcastic fringehead). Animal Diversity Web. Retrieved March 10, 2024, from https://animaldiversity.org/accounts/Neoclinus_blanchardi

​‌‌‍‍​‍The Editors of Encyclopaedia Britannica. (2010). Hoatzin. In J. Rafferty (Ed.), Encyclopedia Britannica. Retrieved April 21, 2024, from https://www.britannica.com/animal/hoatzin

​‌‌‍‍​‍U.S. National Park Service. (n.d.). Side-Blotched Lizard. Retrieved April 1, 2024, from https://www.nps.gov/places/side-blotched-lizard.htm

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​‌‌‍‍​‍Zielinski, S. (2011, October 26). The Lizards That Live Rock-Paper-Scissors. Smithsonian Magazine. https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-lizards-that-live-rock-paper-scissors-118219795

​‌‌‍‍​‍Zoo Zürich. (n.d.). Atlantic mudskipper. Retrieved April 6, 2024, from https://www.zoo.ch/en/atlantic-mudskipper